For the Hard-to-Reach “Evil Maniac” Demographic

They’re are hard niche to get a foothold on, I would assume. The sheer amount of money needed to simply deliver ads to their secret lairs would alone cost Apple a fortune. Not to mention that the deliverymen would be killed. Funeral costs would need to be incorporated… at this rate, the overheads would be ridiculous. If I remember correctly, these are Darren’s favorite comic book villians; I myself am a fan of Magneto. Not his costume, mind you, just the guy himself, ’cause he’s a badass. Also hard to win a moral argument against, because you accuse him of being a eugenicist, and he points out that he’s Holocaust survivor and you’re like “oh. oh, well,… well damn.” And then he’d kill you. ‘Cause he’s a badass. Wait, I meant evil. The Joker’s also pretty amazing. It’s still hard to imagine that he went from a gimmicky trickster in the ’50s to the complex, psychologically-twisted murderer that he is today. I kinda wonder if his transformation over the past several decades tells us something about our cultural growth as a whole… ah, who am I kidding, I’m no Humanities major. Someone else think about it and let me know what you come up with! Also, I’m not sure if I’m going to keep the comic strip like this… I want to actually draw the three of them, so I’ll probably be trying that sooner or later. Stay tuned for that.

~Tirumari

Why I hate Apple

I didn’t always hate Apple. There was a time when Apple was the underdog, a niche for rebel techies and graphic designers. And then the best thing that could ever happen to that little company happened: Steve Jobs came back. A decade later and suddenly we’ve all turned into iPod zombies with blank expressions and earbuds walking around like we don’t give a @#$%. And then, on top of that we’ve got “iEverything”. iMac, iBook, iPhone, iPhoto, iHome…what’s next? iBed? iRefrigerator? iCandy? iDesperatelyNeedAGirlfriend? Or maybe something along the lines of this.

Now I know what you’re all thinking. You’re thinking “Oh, he’s just bitter.” And you’d be right, but before you pass judgment, you’d best know WHY I’m bitter.

Apple BETRAYED me.

Yeah, that’s right. They stabbed me in the back the minute they became all hip and trendy and every Baby Boomer and his mum fell in love with them. And all of a sudden, everyone is walking around with tech plastered with the logo of the forbidden fruit and I’m left wondering what the hell happened.

So really, it’s the oldest story in the book…or rather the most teenage angsty: Apple starts out a dork, then drops the dork look for a whole new “cool” look, curbs all his dorky friends, becomes popular, and ta-dah, end of story everybody loves the new and improved Apple.

And of course, being who I am, I couldn’t stand the “person” Apple had become, especially when they started running those commercials that typecasted the PC as a inept, if somehow lovable, dork and the Mac as some cool, trendy indie guy.

So, bitter?

Yes.

Angry?

Yes.

Rightfully so?

No.

Because I’m being petty?

Yes.

Which brings me to the final point of this post: I am a very, very, very petty person. Shallow even. Vain? Oh, absolutely. Arrogant? No doubt. Stupid? No, duh.

And why? Because I’m a bloody COMIC BOOK CHARACTER. Or just a character period. So is everybody on the internet (and to some degree real life). Don’t take anything I say here (or perhaps even in real life depending on how much sleep/food I’ve had) seriously! You just can’t, especially if you haven’t even MET me. Plus, the point of this blog and, hopefully, of this comic, is to provoke thought, either for or against what I say, I don’t really CARE.

So that’s it. The gloves are off. The pencil is on the paper. Take whatever I say with a grain of salt or however you like, but if you think something…well, I’ve done my job.

P.S. Sorry about the half-assed post. Two papers due within two days of each other: a week of sleep deprivation. Two midterms the following week: slightly less worse sleep deprivation. Getting sick for all four and not getting time off: priceless.

Annnnd that didn’t even make sense. I’m going back to bed now.

Ohhh wait, I can’t, I signed up for a presentation on Friday.

P.P.S. What I said in the post half applies. As some kindly soul that hasn’t already stopped reading due to my bitchiness may have figured out, I’m very, very tired and angry right now so please, take whatever good things (if any are left) from that charbroiled black pit that came out instead of the warm, fluffy pie of a blog post I was expecting, and help yourself.

~Darren